Sunday, December 25, 2011

Busy, busy Krismas

I was writing a quick note on Tumblr but it turned into a stream of consciousness about all the stuff I've been doing over the last couple of days, so I thought it was better if I shared it here instead.  You may need to imbibe a great deal of coffee, tea, No-Doz or other product that will keep you awake if you intend to read all the way to the end :)

So many things have happened in the last couple of days, it's hard to keep up!  Let's see, we opened prezzies on Friday, I got the most expensive thing I've ever owned besides furniture and cars-a Michael Kors Item Tote in Lapis.  It's the most gorgeous thing EVAH.  The cool thing is that we only paid $138 for it through the military exchange!  Cha-ching!  I also got a gorgeous super fluffy pink blanket that I adore and need, for my mental health-long story.  I got a Keurig coffee machine with those little individual buckets!!!  I love it.  The only drawback is that it's not as strong as I like it.  I wonder if I can poke a hole in the buckets and add a little more grounds...My MIL sent us all gifts and I got this kick ass pair of slippers, they're the right size!!!  I'm so excited that she remembered my size, actually she may have asked the Hubster what size now that I think of it.  They're furry inside and have a nice rubbery sole so I can wear them out back on the patio comfortably.  The also gave me a pair of pajama pants that are way to small, not really her fault.  I usually wear a 2X on the bottom, but wherever she got those things makes a 2X approximately the same as a woman's medium.  She also gave me a pair of red super soft slipper socks!  She's a real doll, I'll send her a note when I get done typing this.  I got a card from my mother, she says she misses us.  I guess I'll send her a note.  She fucking came unglued at the kids and me over the summer when we were visiting her 6 hours away from home.  I don't know if she wants back in, and if I do let her back in if she ever pulls anything like that again I don't know what I'll do.  I haven't spoken to her since it happened.  Or my sister.  We're in a couple of online groups together, I don't think she realizes that I'm not talking to her, because I blame her for my mother losing her mind on my ass.  
    Anywho:  Hubby's dad sent us $400 and hubby got $400 for a bonus at work so he gave me and the kids $150 each to buy whatever we wanted to!!!!!  So, the kids and I went all over both towns and the mall yesterday.  I got a pair of purple leggings-the entire store (Fashion Bug) was on sale except for the two damned things I grabbed, the leggings and a bottle of silver crackle nail polish, both of which had sale signs directly above them....Anywho...Purple leggings, because I can rock that shit, two plain but comfy pajama shirts, a gorgeous thin knit poncho with those angel wing things.  I've been resistant because I'm kind of fat but it's so comfortable I really don't care.  OOO, all I talk about is how American women get sucked in to spending so much on beauty products in a year it's disgusting.  Srsly, I go on and on about it.  But the boy and I were walking through JCPenney's waiting on my daughter and I steered my way through Sephora.  On purpose.  I really wanted to look at their nail polish.  I obsess over nail polish, all day, every day, all the time.  It was pretty, and it was $9.50 a bottle.  FMA.  But, I did buy a bottle, just to have one to experiment with for the blog. I got Stop Stocking Me.  When you look at the bottle it's kind of a tarnished purpley/gold thing but on the nail it's totally purple.  If I had done my research properly I would have gone in there to get a couple of specific colors like that super silver mirrored one and maybe the super glitters.  But I have another idea about that, saving for later!
     Ok, I know I bought more than that for $150...Or not.  Everything was on sale though!  What did I buy at Lane Bryant?  Oh, the skirts.  I needed to buy bras, they were buy 2 get two free, which still boils down to $60, but I needed the skirts more.  They were on the sale rack, and half off but still twenty and twenty five each.  Fuck. I also picked up the prettiest ring for $10.  It's one of those stretchy band ones and the top is elaborate and huge with a peacock feather eye thingy, all of my favorite colors are in it and it's gorgeous.  I'm addicted to these rings too...Which is the dumbest thing on the fucking planet.  I'm allergic to metal.  But I can wear these because they're mostly plastic, at least the part touching your finger is.  If it's not I just don't wear it for very long.  OOOooo!  Right when we were done shopping my son wanted to check out the vendor that does those charcoal/pencil drawings at the end of the mall and they have a new store...All accessories/jewelry by color in every color known to man.  ZOMG.  Of course I was dead ass broke by then.  The cobalt blue counter was amazing, I fell in love with two rings: one was a cluster of about a dozen soft pink roses with tiny sparkle in the middle of each rose and a tiny pink heart that was a watch too.  So damned cute.  I wanted to hide under a counter and sleep there over the holiday, just so I could check out every single bag, clutch, brooch, RING, necklace, bracelet, wallet, grooming kit, manicure kit, EVERYTHING.  Color coordinated!  Fake!  It's called Charming Charlie, according to the daughter.  I was blown away.  I'm really not into jewelry, I SWEAR!!!  Because of my metal allergy.  I don't wear a wedding ring, I've been married for 21 years!  I used to try to wear jewelry people gave me as gifts but I'd always get hives, no matter what it was.  With gold rings my fingers end up looking like they've got athlete's foot, or athlete's hand as the case may be.  I guess I'm embracing my girly, ew, side.  That term...must be renovated.  I'm embracing my.....Drag queen side.  There we go.  Much better.  It suits me better too.  I'm a big ol' bitch, bigger than life itself, my stuff is all big and loud as I am, so I'm using that term!  I'm embracing my inner drag queen!  Back to business:  
    Money goes so quick.  We had to go to Target to get some stuff for hubby and I was evil and bought some stuff on the debit card even though I had already spend all of my Krismas money...They finally had some damned shirts!!!!!  Holy Shit Balls!  They had new styles of tshirts that were nice and comfy and they had a gorgeous long sleeved top that doesn't have ruffles, sequins, lace, kittens or any other ugly shit.  And the sleeves are human sized!  Not super tight!  So I HAD to buy them, right???  RIGHT????  I bought a feather pillow too.  I've been sleeping so badly, I just can't get a good night in, and I'm on a fist full of drugs to make me sleep, no way in hell should I be rolling around all night.  
    So the other thing that happened Friday and Saturday, I dyed my hair purple.  At first I was just going for a few strands in the front, framing my face.  I couldn't get a good applicator so I used one of my paint brushes, about half an inch wide.  I did a little more and called it a day, I rinsed it out pretty much immediately and it was PURPLE and awesome.  I'm using Beyond the Zone, BTW.  I loved it, but there were large chunks that just needed some love on the side with all the hair.  So I put some more purple on, do you see where this is going??  I was trying to get the lower side, then I decided to try to put a little on the back by myself, I just took the brush and swiped several nice sized chunks.  I rinsed and witnessed a nasty ass purple job.  It looked like I hadn't even attempted to make strands out of it, it looked like I just dipped the crown of my head in purple and then put in some zebra stripes in the back.  EW.  Luckily, I still had a package of Quick Blue!  Yay!!!  I swear, that stuff is awesome.  I've been bleaching the shit out of my hair for several months and have never, ever had a problem with it.  No breakage, no nastiness.  I also use a kick ass conditioner if it feels nasty after I've bleached it but never any probs.  Ok, where was I.  Quick Blue to the rescue!  I pinned up a little purple around my face because that's what I wanted originally, LOL.  So I just slapped on the bleach, twice.  I use 30% developer and shampoo in my bleach, so after I hit it and it didn't look like it was doing much I added a little more developer and shampoo and hit it again.  I wrapped it in plastic wrap and put the hair dryer to it.  I sat for about 50 minutes, probably more than that though.  I was mortified by what I was looking at.  At least it wasn't the fuchsia that it was earlier.  The second helping took care of that.  So, I took the plunge and rinsed it.  I saw loads of pink coming out, but the family was watching intently from the couch and they said "Oh.My.God."  Then the hubby yelled something really bad and I screamed at him "WHAT?????"  "Oh, I was watching the game" he says...Heavy sigh.  I rinse and rinse, then I wash the whole thing and condition it.  The fam just looks at me as I walk the Green Mile, or should it be the Pink Mile now?  I go to the bathroom and brush it straight forward as I usually do, it's cotton candy pink, all the way around with the shock of purple on my bangs.  Holy shit.  It's gorgeous but not what I was going for.  See, I don't do pink.  I'm not a chick like that.  I'm kind of anti-pink if you know what I mean.  I'm a card carrying Amazon, but I like to do my nails.  I wear dresses now, but only because they're so much easier to wear.  I just started wearing them this year!  I never, EVER, wear jeans.  EVER.  Back on track, stream of consciousness posts are common lately.  Ok, I slap my gel in it, blow it dry like I usually do and take a look.  It's fucking awesome.  I got my purple, and it's gorgeous pink all over the rest of my hair, just a little in the back though.  Pink is so much more forgiving.  Hubby is totally in love with it.  He was so negative about me even coloring my hair and he insists it's because he doesn't want me to be disappointed when it doesn't turn out right.  He's a douche, he just doesn't want it to be crappy and have to go out in public with me, but he won't admit that.  Anyway, I almost had to take the garden hose to him last night, he LOVES it.  He didn't like the purple all over, he was freaking out when I had the bleach in and the plastic wrap over it.  He was sweating bullets, but he will not admit it :)  After I came out and it looked like a fucking goddess, he loves it.  To him, it's the right amount of freaky, of being different, whatever.  Now I have a tattoo and colored hair, I'm the freak of the week according to him.  And that's ok, I just wish he would admit that he didn't want me to color my hair for HIS reasons.  Not mine.  It loos awesome.  I got several comments on it yesterday when we were shopping.  Both my peeps at Sally's had to get the lowdown, they thought it looked great too.  They thought it looked like I meant to do it, cool beans dude.  And Rick, the dude that goes back and forth with me like we're an old married couple, he told me I did a great job on it, that meant TONS to me.  He just doesn't say shit like that.  The sales peeps at Fashion Bug, Penney's and Lane Bryant all said something, half of them wanted me to tell them how I did it!  Well shit, now I guess I have to post a recipe on "How to Fuck Up Your Hair Color So It Looks Awesome" or something.  
    I guess that's it.  I picked up some stuff at Sally's as well.  I had a basket full, 6 polishes, two holiday packs, one with two China Glaze polishes and an ornament, one with three polishes and a little fuzzy bag/wallet/thingie of some sort.  But, I knew I wanted to have some money left for the mall and put most of it back.  I got two China Glaze polishes, Princess Grace which is the most gorgeous light pink, almost translucent, but it's not thin at all.  I was worried that since it's a light pink it would be super thin like most of the other stuff like that but I tried it on last night and two coats covered just like any other polish.  I also got CG Grape Juice.  I swear, I had four more I had to put back :(  I love nail polish, it makes me happy!  I was supposed to save enough money to get acrylic nails done.  I've been doing glue-on nails all summer because I'm too cheap to get acrylics but I think it's time to just bite the bullet and get them done.  Doing the glue-ons gets to be such a pain in the ass.  You've got super glue everywhere, you've got nails popping off everywhere, it's fun as hell, you get to do whatever you want because you know you can just pop them off whenever you want to!  But, like I said, it's a pain in the ass.  Not to mention that the nail packages you get at the drug stores or big stores are crap.  I love the ones they have at Sally's, I just buy the large package of overlays, not tips but the full nail overlays.  I glue them over my whole nail, cut them down to wherever I want them, shape and polish.  The glue is the biggest pain in the ass.  There's one that is so awesome, and I can't remember which package it came in.  It's a little pink tube, and it fits right in the top of the tips package while you are getting your next nail ready.  AND it holds for over a week.  I think it was in one of those packets of already done nails, I'll look next time I'm in the store, you know, for my reader's benefit :)  Because I totally have readers and stuff......Hahahaha!  So, if I get acrylics I can do all sorts of shit to them, manicures and polish changes and whatever I want!  And I won't have to worry about the damned things popping off, being the wrong size, melting when you take the polish off, having glue all over your hands and fingers (seriously, you have to take a nail file or buffer to it, evil,) I just have to wait until next week.  Blergh.  I want to do them NOW.  
    Another thing I want to mess with in the realm of nails is making my own chunky glitter thingies.  You know how they have those polishes with the HUGE chunks of glitter that you can't even get out, it's all stuck to the sides of the bottle and crap?  I picked up a packet of little appliques at Sally's with the intent to glue them on whatever designs I come up with, but then I started thinking, these are really tiny...What if I combined them with some clear polish and tried applying that to a nail?  If I used it in a craft paint palette I would always be able to get at the bits I want on my nails...They're really kind of too big, well some of them are anyway.  There are 10 packets:  white super tiny balls, black super tiny balls, I have no clue what in the hell they are intending the user to do with these.  They are way too small to use with any sort of applicator and they're too small to shake a couple onto a nail.  Hmmm.  Next:  Irridescent white 5 petal flowers, multi-faceted blue,green,gold,purple circles with a hole in the middle.  Those two I don't think would work in a polish, they're pretty big.  Next row:  Iridescent white teardrops, next is shiny green hearts.  Green hearts?  Rilly?  The teardrops would be gorgeous in a polish,  hell, I think they both would honestly.  But like I said earlier, there really are not a lot of these little things.  I paid $5 for the whole shebang, not bad.  Next:  Silver stars with the middle cut out, next is gold 5 petal flowers with circles cut out of the middle.  The stars are perfect for a clear polish!  Flowers, not so much, they've got to be good for something but I've no clue what that is at the mo.  Finally:  Silver stars, then gold slivers.  The stars could go either way, I've seen glitters bigger.  The gold has got to GO.  OMG, it's leaching out of it's packaging, LOL!  I'm seeing a nail with a fresh layer of Gelous and then a cut out of a nail over it and sprinkling the gold over it...That may be a bit much.  Maybe a black nail, pain the tip with Gelous and dip it in the gold slivers...that sounds cool!  There's not a lot of any of these little appliques so I have to be careful how I use them.  Well, not really, I'm up at Sally's all the time :)  Yesterday when we went in the chick gave the standard "welcome to Sally's" greeting and stopped halfway through!  She just started talking to us like we're old friends, she said she had to go into the back, if we needed any help...she stopped herself right there and said "Hell, you guys are in here almost as much as I am!  You probably know the store better too!  Just let me know when you're ready to check out!"  It was cute :)  Wow, I can really go on and on talking about stupid fucking nail products, can't I?  
    I go on and on to my kids and my hubby about their ridiculous addictions to consumerism, TVs, video games, phones, clothes (daughter, getting more ridiculous every day, post for later.)  I suppose I have been sucked in as well.  I don't leave the house much.  Now that we are on mail order pharmacy I hardly go out at all.  That was my main thing I had to go out to get, medication.  The kids and I are both on medication and our insurance would only let us get them two days before we were to run out so we were up there shuffling around a LOT.  Anyway, we don't have a lot of money for me to go out and run around spending on stupid nail shit.  Or yarn.  I haven't even begun to tell you about my yarn addiction.  Probably because I've been off my yarn for about a month.  I can't seen to get into it, most likely a casualty of the Seasonal Affective Disorder and mania.  Anywho.  I suppose I'm just as much a consumer as they are, but I have a conscience.  And it haunts me.  They have no such thing.  And they're Bipolar, as am I, so we don't always have the best ideas regarding what our money is spent on.  I make lists.  All damned day.  I have about 6 little notepads, in my purse, one at the big computer, one at the lap top, a couple at my chair, one in my purse.  My memory is so poor I have to use them or else I would loose everything! My main problem is that I remember the first couple of things on my list so I buy 10 of those but forget the rest of the list... I don't want to buy so much crap.  I don't want to have 50 bottles of nail polish.  But I got most of them for 1.99.  So that's something, right?  I buy clothes that I really need.  I don't even have anything hung up in my closet, just my one chest of drawers and a laundry basket full.  How many women do you know with that amount of clothes?  Reduce.  That's my thing.  I don't buy yarn like I used to.  I buy for the project I need, or if something is on sale and I can see the exact project I will make it into I will buy it.  I love being crafty.  It makes me feel good, and I've just recently been able to make things for other people and that makes me feel good too.  If I don't get disability I'm going to try to get a crochet business started.  If my body holds up...Anyway.  Does any of that make the least bit of sense?  I don't want to waste money but I spend it on nail polish!  But I use the shit out of nail polish, so does that count?  I obviously don't overspend on clothes since I've still got room in my one chest of drawers.  Ok, I've managed to rationalize my spending!!  Go me!!!  And in just a couple of months it will be Taxmas...and hopefully we will be getting some money back and THEN I can get my bras!  And hopefully some more maxi-dresses, I'm addicted to them.  You throw them on, they cover your hairy legs, it appears like you're spending time on your appearance since you're wearing a dress but it's the exact opposite!  Ha!  Take that fashion police!  I guess that's it, I'm going to go pet my Michael Kors bag, that is wonderful and fantastic and beautiful
    So, I've managed to come to terms with my overspending at the time of year people celebrate a holiday they've celebrated for a couple of hundred years, how 'bout you?

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